you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
