okay pat passed out under dana's car
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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