I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
