What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
