we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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