I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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