My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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