wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
