Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
