ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Randomize
