If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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