That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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