If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize