This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I got her a Nickelback box set.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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