So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
