i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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