ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
