At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
