Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
