woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize
