Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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