I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
