It's Friday. Sex?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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