I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize