Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize