OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
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#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
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Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize