Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
It's Friday. Sex?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
