my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
