Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
