he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
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