this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
