he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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