I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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