This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
