hotel room ftw
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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