So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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