Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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