ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
