Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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