so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
