i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
