Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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