Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
