what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Randomize
