I showed him my bush... on skype.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
