Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize