We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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