i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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