Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.