I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Randomize
