Sponge bath it is.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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